


I’ll Sleep When I’ve Saved Them

by themarginalartist



Category: HLVRAI - Fandom, Half-Life, Half-Life VR But The AI Is Self Aware
Genre: And Gets One, Gordon doesn’t self care well, Gordon needs a nap
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-03
Updated: 2020-09-04
Packaged: 2021-03-06 18:28:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,463
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26263432
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/themarginalartist/pseuds/themarginalartist
Summary: Gordon may have just been the player but he took Dr. Coomer’s words quite seriously about getting them out of the game. And he won’t waste a minute to try and get his friends out.Even if it means forgoing sleep.————An anon prompt from Tumblr
Comments: 21
Kudos: 218





	1. Chapter 1

Dr. Coomer’s final message to him had been stuck on his head on loop since the game ended. And being unable to sleep with all that had happened he started the game he set about getting to work on freeing them. He had to. He promised. And Gordon wasn’t about to go back on it. 

Though Gordon had only a cursory knowledge of coding. He’d had plenty of friends who’d gone down that path for their educations, complaining about coding assignments or sitting and pulling all-nighters working on his physics research papers in their room while they coded. He’d picked some small things up when he’d taken breaks to stare at the text over their shoulders, but he doubted it’d be enough to know how to get them out. If it was possible. 

When the team found out his name really is Gordon Freeman and he has a physics degree they are going to lose their minds. His friends had always teased him about the series saying it was made for him, and it sure felt like it after all of... That.

How was the science team even going to have physical forms? Would they be like those little characters that ran around on the computer screen? That’s at least out of the game but... Hmm...

Gordon continued to ponder the problems he’d have to overcome as he opened up some coding tutorial websites. He stared at them over the course of the night, working through some of the example problems and it wasn’t until the first orange rays of sunrise made it hard to see his computer monitor he realized his mistake. 

It had been Sunday. Now it’s Monday... He had work in... 3 hours? 

“Fuck.” Gordon breathed out as he slowly moved his cursor and minimized the browser window. 

If he ever wished he’d lived in a video game for real it was right now. He would rather have been the in game Gordon Freeman going home to wherever that actually would be and not have work to come back to and some real government hush money head his way. He stood slowly, putting his computer to sleep, and trudged to the shower. Once clean and dressed it was coffee time. He yawns while the water boils making him reach for his much larger mug. It’s going to be a long day that’s for sure.

XXXXXXXXXXX

After a frankly exhausting day at work he ate a quick meal and immediately plopped down at his computer, beginning to practice coding while trying to find some stuff about modding games, since that’d also help him know what he was trying to get into as well. 

He pulled out a blank notebook, writing the date for yesterday and the things he’d done followed by going to the next blank page and writing the current date and what he’d been doing down. A habit from when he had to do long hours of research in college, a way to organize thoughts and resources, and keep a steady diary of his progress. 

He once again failed to notice the time before the sun came up again. 

“Shit... Gotta sleep tonight...” He shakes his head and heads to the shower. Once again picking the bigger mug to fill up for coffee once he makes it. 

About two in the afternoon he ends up taking a small nap at his desk. His office mate waking him up fifteen minutes later with a held back chuckle telling him to not drool on the desk. Gordon gives a chuckle and an excuse of being too into a game the night before, getting a pat on the back from his coworker and a gentle reminder to get some sleep. 

Gordon waved them off and got back to work. He’d sleep tonight, after he put a few more hours into understanding coding and modding and stuff. At least crack open the game files and see if he could at least find the files for the science team. Darnold, Forzen, and G-man should be on the list too. The three of them hadn’t been with him throughout, but they did make an impression. Plus Gordon was pretty sure if he didn’t get G-man out that Tommy would be super sad about his dad as well as G-man would find his own way out and do... unpleasant things to Gordon. 

He was still hesitant about getting Benrey out though. But during the boss fight it had felt... Bad to kill him off. Benrey was a jerk but... Gordon wouldn’t lie; he did make him laugh a lot as well. 

He wrote a few things on a loose page of paper, gently sticking it in his folder to take home and add to his notes. 

Probably should start carrying that notebook with him...

XXXXXXXXXXX

When the weekend came Gordon poured himself into learning as much as he could and trying to figure out where the files he needed were in the game. He only got up for food and small stretch breaks when his back screamed in protest from being in one position for too long. 

Gordon doesn’t even remember actually eating on Sunday morning, actually he didn’t eat that morning given the ferocious growl his stomach just made. With a sigh he gets up to actually get food and make some coffee. While he waits for the pot of water to boil he sits down on his couch, closing his eyes for a minute. 

He wakes up an hour later after a nightmare of the military taking his hand got intense. He blinks blearily and sighs as he sets the water which had cooled to boil again. It may not have been his real arm that got chopped off, but damn did his mind want to make it feel like it had been. 

He sits and eats slowly, trying to keep his mind off the nightmare and focus on re-reading his notes as he chews. There were still so many unknowns, so many questions as to how to make them be real like he was. He wanted something more concrete to write down in his notebook than  _ ‘get them out’ _ . 

Gordon doesn’t fall back asleep. Working on trying to understand the file he was staring at. Turned out to be some random NPC. He pouts as he writes down his notes, at least he’s getting closer.

XXXXXXXXXXX

His co-worker kicked his ass out of the office, telling him that he looked like a zombie and to take a sick day. Gordon didn’t really care too much, he’d been barely paying attention to work things for the past two weeks. He was starting to get somewhere, finding the files for Dr. Coomer, but he didn’t move them or have luck finding the rest yet. He would definitely not be admitting to having cried in relief of finding one of them. 

He missed them all a lot. And the guilt of how long it was taking was making it hard to sleep when he did force himself to try and go to bed. Sometimes he’d have to force himself to sleep on the couch so as to not stare at the blinking lights on his computer which inevitably made him get up and work at it again. 

He put in for a temporary leave at work the next morning, he really just couldn’t focus on work. Thankfully they had just wrapped on a big research endeavor the company had undertaken and would be taking on a new one so he could miss out on the start of the new one and catch up later. 

He had to get the team out. They were still trapped in there. It’s all his mind could focus on. He just wanted to see them again, hear them talking to him and making dumb jokes with him. 

Hell he’d get Benrey out too. He missed the dumb jokes and the sweet voice. He didn’t miss the passport bullshit though, he would kick Benrey’s ass without hesitation if that came up again. 

_ He had to get them out. _

XXXXXXXXXXX

A month. 

A month of little to no sleep. He’d passed out at his desk far too many times, startling awake at a nightmare or from a shiver when he got cold. 

His back hurt pretty much all the time. 

He’s not really sure the last time he ate a meal that took him longer than a few minutes to slap together. He’d even ordered his groceries online to minimize the time away from the desktop computer he was working at nearly 24/7. 

It didn’t matter though, he still hadn’t gotten their files all tracked down. Forzen, G-man, and Benrey’s were still not located. He still had no plan on making them physical but he did feel comfortable enough now to sequester their code in a folder so he could keep everyone he did have in one place. 

He rubbed at his eyes, dark circles had taken root under them from how little he actually slept. Hand writing a few things down in the now well loved notebook he’s been using. It was certainly a lot more beat up now. A few coffee stains on some pages and scribbled out lines here or there. 

And while Gordon was certainly no artist he’d doodled the team a few times. Most of the time he doodled when it hurt that he still hadn’t gotten them out yet.

He wouldn’t admit to the wrinkles on those pages being from tears when the guilt got too much. 

* * *

He’d finally gotten everyone. Bubby, Dr. Coomer, Tommy, Darnold, Forzen, G-man, Benrey, and Sunkist. Everyone’s files. Their models, their voices, their code. 

He’d checked and triple checked and checked a few more times that he wasn’t missing anything from anyone. And finally confident of that he cried in relief at the folder he had open. 

Two and a half months of digging and scrapping and scouring over code and tutorials. 

But he had them all together now. All of them were there and safe and- 

Why was the computer’s fan kicking up? Shit the desktop had gotten hot. Gordon shut the browser down and a few other programs that he didn’t need open to see if that would help. 

Except it seemed to do the opposite? Gordon was terrified. He can’t lose them, not after all he’s gotten done! He quickly runs and plugs in his external storage device to make a back up. 

His heart drops when his eyes come back up and his monitor shows a blue screen before going black. 

“No... No!  _ Nonononononononono! _ ” Gordon scrambles up from under the desk. “Please no! Not now! Not when I had them all!” He frantically goes to his notes, he’d made sure to write a number of things down in case things hit the fan and the computer got bricked somehow, and why he didn’t allow himself food or drink next to the computer. 

This was his worst nightmare. 

Not the ones his hand got cut off. Or when things went south in the boss fight and he ended up dead. Or other life threatening moments that had played through the screens in the VR headset. 

He couldn’t lose them. Not like this. Not now.

He mumbled to himself in his panic before crawling under his desk to see if there was something wrong with the cables, anything damaged with the desktop, or a loose cable to his monitor. His heartbeat pounded in his ears, the only noise he could hear now, especially as it got faster and faster not finding anything that was wrong with his machine. 

“I can’t fucking lose them! I had them! I can’t!” Gordon comes back out from under the desk to jostle the mouse and see if that would fix his computer, fruitless if what he thinks just happened to it happened. “Please, please not now. Not like this. I just got them all together. I had all of them. I had them...” 

Gordon stares blankly at the black monitor. 

“How long are we gonna let him act like a crazy person. This is getting kinda sad.” Bubby’s voice breaks him out of what was going to be quite the melt down from stress and exhaustion and grief from losing his friends, whipping his head around and staring with wide eyes at them all. 

“Are- are you all-“ Gordon gets cut off by Coomer pulling him into a tight hug, quickly followed by Tommy. And they were real! Real and hugging him and Gordon melted into them as some tears of happiness came out as he let out a startled laugh. 

“You did it, Gordon! I knew you would!” Dr. Coomer smiles brightly at him. 

“Thank you mister Freeman!” Tommy’s smile is like a sun beam. “Everyone! Mister Freeman needs a hug! Wait is that your name?” 

Gordon lets out a shaky laugh and confirms that his name really is Gordon Freeman which gets some chatter from them as they all surround him, minus G-man, Forzen, and Darnold, not that he expected them to join the hug, but there were small smiles on their faces and they hovered close by. Benrey draping himself over Gordon’s shoulders and rambling in his ear about something that Gordon doesn’t catch but doesn’t care as he throws an arm he got free around the alien security guard after turning to pull him off his shoulders. Benrey immediately shuts up and blinks at him with wide eyes before grinning sharply with a shake of his head. 

Gordon laughs and smiles and takes them all in, all talking at once before he catches Benrey staring at him before saying something that stops everyone. 

“...Yo... Feetman? When was the last time you like, slept bro?” Benrey frowned at Gordon. 

“What? What’s that matter?” Gordon asks, not meeting the guard’s eyes. Instead getting to stare at Tommy who immediately frowned as well. 

“Mister Freeman!” Tommy pouts at him. “We appreciate you putting in the time to get us out but not at the expense of your health!”

“My health is fine!” Gordon shakes his head. “Besides it was important to me you guys got out.” 

“You’re an idiot. We were fine waiting you know.” Bubby rolls his eyes. 

“I wasn’t! I took time off of work and everything.” Gordon defends. 

“Wow dude’s been at this for two and a half months.” Forzen comments as he looks over the notebook on Gordon’s desk. 

“Yeah which is why I wasn’t okay with waiting!” Gordon frowns. “Come on, what do you guys want to do first? We can like go to the park or something?” Gordon tries but the unimpressed stares he’s getting make him chuckle nervously. “Guys?”

“First thing we’re doing is getting your ass to bed!” Coomer smiles in a semi-threatening way. 

“No! I’ve slept fine! Gordon slept fine many times!” He shakes his head vehemently. 

“We- we aren’t going anywhere mister Freeman.” Tommy gives him a smile and pat on his shoulder. 

“Yeah which isn’t fair to you guys! I have so much to show you all. And you guys just got out-“ Gordon’s interrupted by Benrey using his sweet voice on him, an amber color that when it hits his cheek makes Gordon yawn. 

“Colored like sap means time to nap!” Tommy chuckles. 

“Nooooooo.” Gordon whines but starts swaying slightly, Coomer keeping him steady with a hand on his back. 

“Stop being a baby, you look like a zombie, and it’s honestly fucking fine Gordon.” Bubby snaps. 

“But guysssss.” Gordon groans as Benrey pulls him over towards the bed, climbing on first before yanking Gordon on top of him. “Omph...” Gordon grunts.

“Shut up and sleep, Feetman.” Benrey rolls his eyes. Gordon just stares at him before blowing a raspberry. “Looks like we have to do this the hard way guys.” Benrey grins. 

“Huh?” Gordon lets out the confused noise eloquently. Gasping as the bed shifts beneath them, eyes now wide in panic as things change around him. “Benrey what the fuck?”

“Making the bed bigger dumbass. Too small to have everyone on it.” Benrey says as if it’s obvious. 

“How the fuck?!”

“Doesn’t matter.” Benrey says blowing more of the yellow sap color at him making his eyes droop. “Come on over bros. Platonic cuddles for Feetman.” Benrey grins. It’s not long until everyone’s piled on the bed, G-man declining quite quickly of course. 

Gordon feels someone drag a blanket over him and more sweet voice hit his cheek from Benrey. His eyelids are so heavy now, barely letting his green eyes be visible for more than a few seconds. He’s losing track of the conversation around him, Tommy had taken his ponytail out and was stroking his hair, Gordon was distantly glad he made sure to at least shower daily still, he wasn’t good at working when he felt gross. He hummed softly as he lost the battle to stay awake, body relaxing against Benrey. 

Once his breathing evened out and he didn’t shift the team let out a small sigh of relief. 

“Geez... Two and a half months?” Bubby grumbles. 

“To be fair, I don’t think Gordon had much coding experience and had been worried about the integrity of our code.” Coomer says gently. 

“The notebook is a mess.” Forzen says, passing it to Tommy to take a look over it.

“It is... Oh look at the doodles of us!” Tommy gasps softly. “Sunkist is so cute as a doodle!” Tommy gushes showing off the notes to the rest of them, getting laughs at some of them, especially with the way Gordon had drawn shark teeth on Benrey and Bubby. 

“He’s a fucking dork.” Benrey chuckles, trying to not jostle Gordon. 

“Is that a diploma on the wall?” Bubby asks. “What did he major in? Probably history.” He huffs a laugh. 

“N-no! He did theoretical physics.” Tommy blinks having been the closest to the framed diploma. 

“Wow. The fuck. What are the odds of that?” Bubby blinks. 

“Bro.” Benrey blinks and stares down at the man draped across him. “That’s so cringe. Thought he’d be at least a little cooler.” Benrey teases the sleeping man. “But even with that fancy degree he’s still shit at taking care of himself.” 

“Good thing we’re here then.” Dr. Coomer says. “Make him learn to sleep properly.” 

“Yeah.” Tommy nods as the others share similar noises of agreement. Gordon’s absolutely getting dragged over the coals, once he’s gotten enough sleep, about proper self care. But for now they just relaxed on the bed together, glad to see the small smile on Gordon’s lips as he finally rests.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So... I saw a comment on this and couldn’t help tack on another small chapter. More domestic fluff! Gordon sick after not sleeping edition!

Gordon woke up feeling like his head was stuffed with cotton and his body was on fire. Hazily making note that his glasses were at some point removed from his face. He pushes himself up on his hands only for them to quickly give out making him fall back down with a grunt. 

“Ugh bro not how you wake someone up.” Benrey grumbles beneath him. Eyes cracking open, more than two? Or maybe it is two? He’s really dizzy right now. When’d Benrey get here again?

“Mmmmmmuuuurgghhhh...” Gordon so eloquently groans on top of Benrey, weakly kicking at the blanket on him, getting it only partially off of him before giving up. “Too hoooottt...” 

“Then take the blanket off? Not hard bro?” Benrey raises an eyebrow and tilts his head slightly. 

“Feel bad... Gordon feel bad...” Is the whine he receives in return. 

“Tommy?” Benrey starts to shake Tommy awake, getting a yawn and a stretch against his side. “Yo Tommy something’s up with Feetman?”

“Huh?” Tommy frowns and leans in to inspect their friend. 

“Not Feetman!” Gordon huffs and weakly headbutts Benrey’s chest before groaning and clutching his head. “Gordon made mistake...” 

“Yes by not sleeping!” Bubby grouses as he gets up, slapping his glasses onto his face. 

“Nooo... headache...” Gordon says, not bothering to lift his head from Benrey’s chest, voice muffled in the fabric of his uniform. Tommy puts his wrist against Gordon’s forehead, eyes widening as he pulls back. 

“He’s g-got a fever.” Tommy frowns. 

“Lack of sleep can weaken one’s immune system! I’m surprised he didn’t get sick sooner!” Coomer frowns hopping out of the bed, giving Sunkist a pat on the back as she comes and leaps into the bed, wiggling in between Gordon and Tommy to snuggle against Gordon.

“Good doggie...” Gordon gives a tired smile and hugs Sunkist. 

“Hug her after I’m out of the bed.” Benrey pouts at being trapped underneath Gordon. 

“Oh you guys are out! I did it! Yay!” Gordon blinks at Benrey before giving a really goofy smile and suddenly passing out again. 

“Come on. Let’s get this bastard some soup and medicine.” Bubby grouses as he hops out of the bed. Tommy helps Benrey get Gordon off of him and tells Sunkist to watch Gordon for them as they follow and join everyone else in the kitchen. Coomer and now Bubby scouring the pantry to prep the soup while Darnold looked to be mixing something together. When questioned it was supposed to be Quil, or will be, the mixing of DayQuil and NyQuil to get pure Quil. 

XXXXXXXXX

Gordon wakes up again when the soup was done, getting a soft boof from Sunkist who’d rested her head in the crook of his arm. 

“Why do I feel like shit?” Gordon grumbles, moving to sit up and stand but quickly getting pushed back down by Tommy’s hand. 

“M-mister Freeman you got sick!” Tommy frowns at him. “We we made some soup! I’ll prop you up!” He smiles and gets some pillows to put behind Gordon’s back. 

“Wha? No not sick. Don’t get sick. Just- just a little tired.” Gordon grouses, “We gotta- gotta go places and stuff!” Gordon waves his hands a little as he speaks. “I’m fine!”

“Bro. Don’t be part of the cringe compilation.” Benrey had slipped into the bed to take the spot on Gordon’s other side that Sunkist had vacated, Tommy still sitting next to Gordon. 

“Not cringe.” Gordon sticks his tongue out. 

“You are so cringe bro.” Benrey teases. 

“You’re cringe. Not poggers.” Gordon huffs as he leans on Tommy, head ending up on Tommy’s shoulder. 

“Bro. Don’t cramp my style.” Benrey frowns. “Sounds dumb coming out of your mouth.”

“Like it doesn’t sound dumb out of yours?” Gordon raises an eyebrow. 

“Ouch gonna have to use my heelies to escape from my hurt feelies.” Benrey deadpans, making Gordon giggle. 

“Soup’s on!” Coomer smiles as he comes back into the room with a bowl of soup. Bubby following behind and then Darnold holding a potion that has some pink colored smoke coming from it. Forzen plops down in the chair by Gordon’s desk, feet on the edge of the bed, playing with Gordon’s 3DS. 

“Huh?” Gordon doesn’t move from Tommy’s shoulder. 

“It’s for you! Mister- mister Freeman, it’ll help make you feel better!” Tommy gently nudges Gordon to sit up, finally getting him to move. “Think- think you can eat it?” Tommy asks. 

“Wh- yeah! Yeah I’m fine! Totally fine!” Gordon blows a huff of air and waves them off weakly. Benrey snorts at Gordon’s attempt to get them off his back. 

Coomer passes the bowl to Gordon and decides to leave with Bubby trailing behind him back out to Gordon’s living room. Gordon stares at it a moment before slowly starting to eat. Tommy and Benrey just get comfortable against him. With just the smallest bit of soup left Gordon can’t bring the spoon up to his lips anymore and starts snoring against Tommy. 

“Bro can barely keep his eyes open.” Benrey chuckles. 

“Kinda ex-expected, Ben, he’s gotta re-rest and recover.” Tommy chuckles as he moves the bowl from Gordon’s hands and passes it to Darnold who takes it out of the room. 

“I knowwww... Think some teal green heal beam would help?”

“Ummm... It might?” Tommy gives a shrug with his free shoulder. Benrey gives a small nod before using the sweet voice on Gordon, the man shifting and pressing closer to Tommy with a sigh. 

“He can try my Quil when he wakes up.” Darnold chuckles. 

XXXXXXXXX

Gordon started to feel better after about three days of soup, sleep, and regular doses of the Quil. The team taking shifts to help Gordon out when he needs it. Now that he’s feeling somewhat better he starts complaining about how much they are helping him out. 

“Guyssss come on I can walk on my own without someone shadowing me.” Gordon groans as both Benrey and Tommy monitor him as he heads to the couch. 

“Yeah except you tripped yesterday.” Bubby rolls his eyes. 

“Not my fault!” Gordon huffs as he flops on the couch. 

“Bro, it was your own feet. Feetman can’t control his feet.” Benrey sits on one side of Gordon, throwing his legs across his lap. 

“Okay I may have stumbled but I was fine!” Gordon grumbles. 

“We’re just make-making sure mister Freeman!” Tommy pats his shoulder taking the opposite side and similarly throwing his legs over Gordon, trapping him. 

“You certainly needed the sleep.” Darnold pipes up. 

“Okay I might have needed to sleep but I don’t need to be treated like a kid!” Gordon huffs, crossing his arms. 

“And you’re not being treated as one my good bitch!” Coomer laughs. “We are simply ensuring your speedy recovery.”

“...Fine. But I can walk on my own.”

“When we see it we’ll believe it.” Bubby ruffles Gordon’s hair as he passes behind the couch to get to the armchair, getting a squawk of protest from Gordon. “Now movie time!” 

“I thought we were watching Star Trek?” Gordon frowns. 

“We said that so you’d get out of your room.” Bubby says making Gordon grunt in a vague noise of amused disappointment. 

“Tonight is James Bond!” Coomer smiles from Bubby’s lap.

“...Acceptable. But Star Trek is tomorrow.” Gordon says as they stick the disc into his PS3 that Benrey had been delighted to find. 

“Don’t worry! We- we’ll make sure to watch it tomorrow.” Tommy laughs. 

They all settle in to watch the film, G-man at some point joining them in his own armchair he got from nowhere. Forzen choosing to lie on a floor pillow Gordon had, petting Sunkist while his eyes watched the screen. 

Gordon settled back, a small smile on his face, it was admittedly a little nice to be taken care of. Not that he’d say it out loud. But he was glad he had them all. A really weird family, but he wouldn’t trade them for the world. 

No one comments but they do smile when they find three quarters of the way through the movie Gordon is completely passed out.


End file.
